;My heart did time in Siberia
was waiting for a lie to come true

ADLIN FAKHRUDIN
cedarnccdelta07
antidote. 07
oal 06-07
vjcRockclimber08

take it or leave it



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Tuesday, December 15, 2009, 12:56 AM

your spirit pulls me through;

CHANGE? cant stand you.
GROW UP? this can wait.
PLAY. GET FAT. AND LOVING IT? sounds goooood :)
this is barely anything i want to put across.
But, if i had added more words, I would be a reaaaaally bitchy person. heh
you know who you are. actually, i dont think you do. nvm.

I've been having a reeeeealllly good time so far. FRIENDS REALLY ARE FOR NUTRTION. I really love the circles of friends i have. It's a really comfortable bunch. like despite the large group, the buzz that goes around is really warm. makes me feel at home. haha, sometimes, i'm afraid i get too comfortable with the friends i have now and that it'll be hard for me to make new friends next time. but ho wells. live it to learn it eh.

I'm so tired right now, but i feel happy because i had a great day with the climbers :) BBQ!
gosh. any day outside home would automatically become a good day now. Though the sleeping time at home is actually quite shiok. haha. Ok, lots have been happening, and if i were to type everything out, my fingers would bleed heh. sooooo pictures la huh. pictures.

I LOVE MY FRIENDS. i never wanna lose them. thanks

i hope my feelings aren't cheated this time




Wednesday, December 2, 2009, 9:42 PM

If I was born again, It'll still be you;

HELLO EVERYONE. In a few hours, I'll be embarking on an adventure called Kuala Lumpur aka Operation Camp5. *oooooooh woooooaaaah eeeee wahhhhhh* shuddup ah i tell you. interesting k.

I hope I don't die there, and that everything will be fine! And that everything will go well. I think Travellers Palm will be great cos the owner Suzy is awesome and nice and i will give her a bigggg bear hug when we leave. AND the company is gonna be great like duh. AND no parents like woohoo. freedommmmmm. ANDD dude, how can we miss out Dunkin Donuts!? and A&W and SUBWAY and 9.90 FISH AND CO and BASKIN ROBINS. ok, yes. I shall excercise some restrain in a land where i can finally eat everything heehee

I have to say again, I miss soooo many people. and I want to see all your faces soon k! :)
please make time in your busy weezy schedule for me? kthanxbai.

ah what i want to say I've forgotten, but what I will say is that I CANNOT WAIT TO GO KL OMG SPASSSSSMMZMZZZ. this will be like the start of many overseas trips that I plan to go with friends. Can you imagine?? It'd be kickass man.

I've been hooked onto Superjunior since I saw Donghae hoho.
and now i can't stop watching their Fullhouse episodes, even tho that's sooo backdated.
OH MY SHUPER GIRL, NI SHI WO DE BABY GIRL
smth smth smth smth NIIII
OH MY SHUPER GIRL, WO SHI NI DE SHUPER MAN
smth smth smth smth
WOAH OH OH OH.
k that's the only few lyrics i can catch, I'm sorry hahaha

I'm obviously on a high, and I dunno why. aiyahhhh.
k goodbye everybody! SEE YOU WHEN I SEE YOU, AND I HOPE THAT'S SOON! :D




Friday, November 27, 2009, 10:49 AM

Life's a gift, and not a given right;

HELLO! omg. i think i might've forgotten how to blog alr. hmmmm

First thing's first, (ok. wow. when did i ever say first thing's first. shitassz cool anw)
A LEVEL IS FUCKING OVER MANNNNNZZZZ :) :) :)
as even tho i dont feel like elated or whatnot- I still am freaking relieved it's over. Like this huge PHEW feeling. I think I can phew for like a week straight man. HOHO. PHEWWWZ. so happy i dont ever have to return to that stupid school until like next year. heehee! yay.

I'm so damn excited about Operation Camp5! gonna be shitassz fun. Climbing like nobody's business, and not have a freaking curfew. yeehee. excited anot? EXCITED LA SIOLLLL.
plus plus plus, the company's gonna be awesome mawesome. I CANNOT WAIT TO GO TO KL. omg, thursday come faster! I want Camp5 and S$9.90 fish&co nowwwww.

and and and, I cant help but say this: THAT I'M EXCITED FOR JONNY'S PROM mannnnzzzz. I hope the suit does not let us down. Shall pressure my dad to make him a freaking shitassz nice one :) omg. he's gonna look awesomeeeee.


OKAY THIS IS THE TIME TO MEET UP PEOPLE!
i cannot wait. like to go shoppinggggg, climbingggg, dinneringggg, gymmingggg, boxingggg (? tariq?) and everythingggggg la. I really wanna meet up with many people! DELTA ESPECIALLY, and my ANTIDOTES! and satha, syaza, pri sch mates, climbers (again, cos i'm never sick of them hee) and like so many la. OMG SO EXCITING. SO DAMN EXCITING.
can you feel my excitement yet?!

oh yeah, selamat hari raya aidil adha.
doink.




Saturday, November 7, 2009, 1:06 AM

I feel like I'm back 12 years ago when I didn't know how to swim,
and my mom flung me into the deep pool

this is A Levels.
gotta try to stay afloat man.

hold your breath, and run.




Tuesday, October 20, 2009, 12:17 AM

Hello. People. Of. The. World.
I don't know how many still come here but yeah, it's been a while.


Been studying. at many random places. Simei, School, Airport, SMU. place doesn't matter really, I just love the company :) been eating irregularly. Sometimes, one meal a day, sometimes two, or sometimes, a bagazillion times a day (THANKS TO NATALIE WEE)
haha and i'm kinda broke now. heh

So much to do, no time to look back man.
I've seen alot of things lately. Simple things in life move me sometimes. It's so easy to make me smile. but I feel my moods getting volatile. I scare myself. I miss soooo many people. I get distracted very easily. need to constantly pinch myself back to reality.

you're like some drug i don't want to swallow
cause you taste better in my mouth, than in my heart.




Thursday, October 1, 2009, 5:16 PM

I came home early today. and on my way home, i just thought "how much of shit am i going to take till i tell myself it's enough?" and it just hit me. THIS MUCH. this is it.

I think it's about time, I stop kidding myself and making myself believe that it's okay to fail because there are other things in life. As in, there ARE other things in life than results, but it doesn't mean I have to be okay allowing this academic part of my life to just go down the drain.

and I dunno. like all my life, I've been working for just as much as I want. as in, PSLE I knew I wanted to get into Cedar, and all I needed was a 245+. So I worked for it. and was okay with a 249. And for VJC, I knew i needed a single digit, so i worked for a 9. I never felt like I needed to be at the top ahead of everyone else, because that's just way beyond what I wanted.
Problem is, I have no clue what I want this time.

and I think the main cause of why I've been like this for so long is that exact reason.
I don't know how much I have to work for anymore. I don't even know how I got here, to this stage where I thought failing was actually cool. It's Attitude really. Attitude, Rebellion, Frustration with the mere boredom of life, because things always go according to plan. and I'm not being a spoiled contented brat saying that. It's just that it has, relative to people whom I know who hasn't had it good so far really.
I have all these things on my side, and I choose to go against it? why?

So yeah, I think one thing I've learnt through the whole Coursework process for the past weeks is the feeling of needing and actually wanting to study, but just not having the time to do it. And I think now that coursework is over, and I can finally come home early and stuff, I'm really gonna do it. I'm done telling people that they're crazy working hard. Because I'm the crazy one NOT working hard at this moment. I'm not scolding myself. This is just a Big Realisation for me.
and it's really about time.

I'm not gonna cut myself out from the world. cause I just don't do stuff like that. I'm still gonna climb, and facebook and twitter and stuff like that, just to stay alive. But this time, I'm really gonna try. Like Adlin, it's about time. You're 18-years-old. As much as you might want to think you're a teenager, and entitled to have a wild social life, you're also a still just a student with a whole future ahead of you. and unless I do something about what I do right now, I won't have anything at all to do in that future, that I would enjoy doing at least.

So this is a Declaration, that of 6pm today, I'm a full-fledged mugger. and I really don't care what the devil in me calls me. This is it. Enough shit, is really enough shit.
This is me being done with being a failure
This is me doing something for my own sake. not for yours anymore.
As much as it's hard to believe, this is me Escaping.

See you in 56 days :)




Monday, September 28, 2009, 11:58 PM

Can't get more than you give me;
just what i need.

everything's so touch and go at this moment in time.
people. work. emotions.

it's kind of idiotic how we don't allow things to last sometimes, just cause we think we can't, just cause we're made to believe that Change is the only constant. things just keep moving. things dont get mended, just keeps moving. you love, then you hate. you make, then you break. and then you just move on. it's idiotic.

i think i may need to make this blog private someday. i'm being far too vague too often.
but i don't think i can, because there are people who automatically expect to be invited as readers; but so happen these are just the exact persons i want to shut away from :/
you know me too well. let's just see how long i can last being wishy washy.

there's trouble brewing in my living room. i'm gonna plug in my earphones now.
i think it's unfair to feel shitty at home. that's the total opposite of why you actually come home for. and i'm through trying to make this work out. because i live with a completely unappreciative bunch (yes, i do include myself in this) and apparently, i'm too young to suggest any changes worth considering. because a fucked up 18 year-old like myself is less likely to think straight, too caught up with turbulent emotions to come up with a consesus. unlike those sane, wise logical adults screaming their lungs out outside.
so yeah. dont interfere adlin. come on now.

haven't had a proper conversation is ages.

haha. don't muck me up people.
i actually had an awesome day today :) Loved Swensons, Fame and of course my cure Climbing ! i'm pretty tired now. i don't really know what i'm talking about at this moment. Still thinking whether i should go to school tmr. hmmmmm. i'm not really in the mood to start studying again for now, although i know my prelims results are gonna be disastrous. so don't nag at me. it won't work. I NEED A FUCKING BREAK.